happy christmas fuck beiber

dj dan ere just wishin u all a veri merry xmas, last year waz a nytmare i got catty on christmas eve and couldnt even eat the dinner mi mum julie had made speshal for me. i just ad proper bad meph mouth and cudnt even fink about eating any mashed potato or parsnips so just caried ont sesh.

JUSTIN BEIBER IS A CREEPER

ma mum gt me this justein beeber poster for xmas i dont even like im hes a reyt jeb end i erd erm try and mc on ITV radio 1 and e wos shit nothin comparing to bars that us leeds lads can spit. a  wanted a tom zanetti calendar but she said she cudnt find any so plz TZ if u r readin this help a bro out this xmas .

lol es a reyt playa r tom

in concluding, if i have 1 peice of advice this xmas eve it is do not get catty, save it for xmas day and have a line with ya nan. this is mi gran dorris last year on xmas day we got on the sesh and i bought her a new snapback it was black she fort it was sik as balls and made er look youf full.

RIP queen of the sesh

sadly dorris cudnt hack the sesh prob cos ov her old age and after her 3rd gram ma line she passed away.

dont u worry, this christmas i will be wearin er hat as a sign of respect to a true nan who waz up for a laugh and get ont sesh wit lads, if u 2 beleive in these morals thn plz make sure u wear ur snapback this xmas in a sign of joint respect for dorris

RIP nan, merry xmas

xxx

Looney productions presents: Jackin the Story!!1

FUCKIN GOING OFF! BIG TIME! STORY OF OUR LIVES!

SWAG blog - MAN OF THE MONTH

HELLO 

Theres no compeition when it comes to the SWAG man of month as the only contender is the man, the myth, the legend, the gym instructor, the firefighter AND the promoter -

Ashley Head...

When it comes to promoters this fella is what we here at SWAG blog call the dogs bollox. His visionary tactics and aspiring drive have propelled him to ultimate SWAG status in Leeds. The idea of changing his facebook name to Ashley Head (Filth-Nest) was an unprecedented and daring act that paid off making him one of the coolest guys to be seen with in leeds.

the old hectik daiz

You can see from the pictures how our Ashley has climbed the long ladder of house music within the Leeds scene starting out at swag favourite HECTIK where he could be found talking about himself and all the big dogs who he knew before stepping on up to the recently deceased UBER where he really excelled himself even though he wore the same T-shirt at both events.  (R.I.P Uber - more info on SWAG blog Uber funeral soon)

stepping it up in uber

Ashley has gone from strength to strength and dared to go where no other promoter has gone, ascending from the leeds electro scene up into the elite snobish tech head scene where he can be seen in the photo chilling with "his bro" Christian Martinez who plays that repetative tech-house shite.

best m8s

We at SWAG blog may not agree with his snobby music taste now so much but we all know deep down that Ashley is still keeping it swag at heart, we know his Itunes is brimming with Tom Zanetti bangers and Swagger bombs so we will let him off.

Hes still a top lad and our good friend but hes making alot of money now as he tells us that he is now the managing director at leeds clubbing brand Nest but is keeping on the low so he doesnt piss off his good mate Timmy 2 tall from back in his Hectik days.

Here's to Ashley Head, SWAG man of the month and may he carry on leading the light for all young aspiring promoters coming onto the scene

You got SWAG bro

SWAG blog loves you

xxx

mint fest - by DJ dan "swag" fletcher

this festivals going off like semtex cant wait to see jamie jones spinnin on da dex!

onions rnt swag

When we first heard about mint festival Here at swag HQ (just round corner from mission2) we wre so buzzin about a full festival of mints lyk! then silly us realised it was a deephouse festival we were evenr more buzzin! propa cant wait for jamie jones to drop hungry for powder itz the new deephouse anfem of us swagheadz.

seff troxler

then got seff troxler on aswell me nd ma spoon r so hyped for some extra stong trebor techno and theres rumors of him at next insomifest , we ope so as he az his swag is off the swag-o-merter! beef and lamb are also a deephouse favourite of ours but I hope they bring some gravy as sometyms they can be abit dry hehe ;)

newaiz i hope to see u there cz all us boyz will be smashin it up all dai long wivout stopin cz we knw how to fukin parteh!!! gna leave u with our latest production frm us ere at swag blog, we gt a swag rap for u dun by our veri own resdent mc greasy rhys es a propa top lad luk at im int glasses hes a ryt character lol x

mc greasy rhys boiiii

check it out >>> here <<<

eres the lyriks so u cn rap along

"ye swag blog listen up, ye swag blog listen up
ye swag blog listen up, ye swag blog listen up

ye swag blog listen up,
a dont say im hungry for the power
cos im hungry for that powder
if its from the ground its sound 
thats why its okay cos its fertiliser
am chatting shit now
a gram for 10 pounds

watch how he drives itl mezmorize ya 
pre party at mine listenin to jamie jones
i aint alone, got my swag boiz in my home
quick gym seshed up, freshen ourselves up
we get on swag blog, racking up lines of boom cat
this shit will stop me getting fat

deep woeful beats make me want to move my vans
make me want to pump my first into the roof
off to mint toilets for a line and a snoot
its loco disco, usually listen to rusko 
but joey essex likes deep house so it must be sick yo

going to the afterparty, pretty tired
but me and you gonna get it on cos am wired
the suuns coming up but a dont give a fuck
i got dread from my comedown
but i got swag so i dont givea fuck

ye swag blog listen up, ye swag blog listen up
ye swag blog listen up, ye swag blog listen up"

peace out nigaz!!!

keep it swag as fuk!!!

by dj dan "swag" fletcher

SWAG ON TOUR - BOAT PARTY

its going to go off course

HABIT ! SWAGGER ! DAWN CHORUS ! SINFUL !

ALL ON ONE BOAT???

YOU WOT!!!

You've all read the marine classic 20,000 leagues under the sea, now get ready for 20,000 leagues under on geebs.

Setting off from the docks down't road from Byker Grove in Newcastle on 9th of November, this is going to be a trip of a lifetime. With 4 of the world's biggest clubbing brands set to take you on a journey not only across the North Sea but also deep into the heart of house music courtesy of international Dj stars such as "Rowdy" Ryan James and "Nutty" Nick Hannam plus more of the finest DJ talents to come out of Yorkshshire since progressive house legend Danny Bond.

swag sailing dynamo esque

Not only good music but expect good women too, especially when landing in amsterdam where you will find many a girl in the shop windows similiar to the ones you find at swagger, habbit and dawn chorus but unfortunately these ones make sure you wear protection (just make sure you havent got cat dick yeah?)

All in all i reckon this trip will be out of this world, make sure you try and stay awake for the entire duration cos remember sleeping is cheatin afterall dont let us down now.

It really makes us proud that our boys Ryan, Nick and the like will be representing the yorkshire swag/deep house scene on international waters, guess it kind of counts as another international gig after there season long residency at Ibiza superclub DC10 at their night Circonogo.

its is what it is 

We are trying to sort it out with our boys at swagger to allow SWAG blog to come aboard and film the whole thing, be sure to message them saying you want us onboard, we will bring 2 tubs of geebs and some old school vintage 2009 cat for anyone who asks swagger to let us onboard.

Stay SWAG sailors!

SWAG blog loves you

SWAG WARNING - DANGERS OF CAT

Remember when they said we were sniffing plant feeder back in the day? It seems asif they may have been correct cos poor Tony got ont sesh for one day too long and look whats happend to him. Its not even funny, he is as ITN say "Completely fucked".  I seen this happen myself other day int old school lofts we was ont sesh and i seen a dandelion poking out of dan's ear after he smashed a 2 gram wophead, we didnt think owt about it at time but a week later he had a cabbage patch growin under his armpit and acorns sprouting out of his arse.

andy bird flying like a bird  

Even our favourite club here at SWAG blog has took a turn for the worse, this is the latest photos from Mission. Looks like the club is going to have to change its air con that circulates mcat throughtout and give the toilet attendant some john paul gotinhair aftershave to spray you with instead "eau de mcate" (imported from paris)

catty as balls 

I've already phoned up Alan Titchmarsh on behalf of swag blog to see if he can give poor cat fiend Tony from east London a trim and maybe come with ground force to fix Mission before freshers....We will keep you updated here, meanwhile get your self to mission (bring a lawnmower if possible) and smash a line before you ride on the zip line!

Watch ya selves!!!

SWAG blog looks after U!

xxx

SWAG NEWS - COCOON IN THE PARK (TEMPLE OF NEWSOM)

Cant wait for this on saturday at the temple of newsom on saturday its going to be the best day of the year a reckon. Am gonna go more loco than the deep house legend himself MR LOCO DICE. i dont listen to much of his music cos i prefer my swagger and i dont even know who Sven Bath is! But i am proper feeling getting geebd up in a field in the sun and pretending a know and love the tunes. A just hope it doesnt rain and wash my fake tan off :(

snakes & ladders

loco dice (nice & spice)

Also playing at cocoon is are lass Cassy, with her mate Beth Troxler bashing out some of Yorkshire finests tunes (TECHNO TECHNO TECHNO). I didmnt make it last year but a heard everyone talking about how there was a huge shit clown when the CDJs had to be Rebooted or summert...dunno bout you but i cant be arsed with any shitclowns this isnt a circus it fuckin HOUSE MUSIC!

fit birds

naughty adam!

This is the first year that they are putting a laserquest on too i cant wait for that i used to go and play at LA bowl and poke all the girls in the dark rooms with my gun ;) i hear that adam sandler is making an appearnce at the afterparty to drop his essential swag BOMBS am gonna see if he can dodge my balls hehe! it at mint hotel warehouse with DJ OZI an oldschool favourite of mine also playing cant WAIT!

alleged picture of the ancient deep house temple of newsome 

Ive been to Newsome before when i was a kid but i could never find the temple?? maybe on saturday the vibrant deep house beats will lead me to the secret ancient temple of newsome and i can read the ancient scrolls. I hear they talk of the forefathers of the leeds deep house scene such as timmy too tall and TZ.

Anyway am off to plan my outfit for cocoon, yes it wil be swag as fuck i will put a picture up at the weekend! remember to holla at us if u see us at cocoon, you best be looking SWAG...we hope to see all your VESTS, SPOONS and TACTICAL DROP CROTCHES out in force expect compliments from us if we see ya ;)

Keep it SWAG till then

XXXX

SWAG NEWS + TUNE OF THE DAY

here at swag HQ we are all still onit from weekend. been having a reyt time like, one of us mates went under and lost his clothes, cat, geebs and his spoon! hes proper gutterd... you can even see his cat dick on pic...hate it when that happens but its orite we used our new special program to hide his identificaton.

simpsons swag

Movin on though, got a wickid tune to get u all buzzin (like us)...it proper cheered our mate up 

 

We all gettin off sesh soon so we save some dollah to get him a new spoon

Nuff luff swagsters!!! 

Keep it swag and Sesh on xxx

Fistful of SWAG

We have struck gold here at SWAG HQ...gold of the spoon variety check it out -

limited edition 5carrot spoonage - now in swag shop

We bet you cant wait to wrap your noses round these unreleased beautys, solid gold and look how shiney they are (wont be shiney when they are brimming with my boom cat :P) we have been busy makin these spoons over the past 2 weeks sorry if we havent been around much bt spoons come first as u all know, whats the point in going out if u dont have a spoon on?

Anyway lets all make the most of the sun, went up hyde park getting bezzled yesterday was gud, it felt right. We had this blastin out my mates ipod dockin station, sadly the skaters dint appreciate it at all and we were getting some reyt mucky looks from the skate park.

skater dudes 

Me being the reasomable man that i am went over and showed them my fresh vans id just bought in town and said it was orite i wore vans so i was "cool" too. I explaned that most of us swagger lot all wear vans now we so we should all get along as we are basically skaters now too. I gave em nick hannams newest mix CD to try out and my number for boomcat, hopefully they will get ont sesh with us sometimes as i really like vans and skaters i think they are cool.

vans = skater + swag friends forever

Thanks to the power of the vans i hope we can all live in a world where skater and swagster alike can unite and get along living in a harmonius sosiety where prejudices are not taken into condensideration.

Help keep the peace in Hyde Park with the skaters and wear vans. They are all okay with it im sure they arent bothered and would be happye to see us swagging it out at stinkeys to some jackin / cool deep house in their beloved vans

KEEP IT SWAG, DUDES!

SWAG - Outfit of the day

luigi folschi - swag idol

Luigi the mario man nice tash x

We received some very intelligent fan mail from this guy.

'whoever has created this site has to be the saddest little dick-ed known to man, and what you doing putting a picture of me with a spoon to my nose for you cretting. my names fozza or luigi foschi on facebook. i dont have fuck all to do with this!! and thats the truth because i know how to spell hectik, coz who evers done this is fucking idiot coz they cant spell for shit.'

So then MR. Fozza or Foschi or eyyyyy luigi wich eva you prefer - Our sprelling is of the highest caliber we take great offense to your coment :(

In order to make it up 2 you we would like to say we are loving these charming pants, they look like someones recycld my grans burbery handbag. Look how they go tight at the bottom but leave u loads of room at the top just incase u shit your pants when your in a kethole - SUPER TACTICAL SHIT SWAG.

We was wondering did u return everythin afta this pic? Cos ur still in shop by the looks of it, maybe u robbed it all that wud be sick proper gangster please let us kno cheers as this could highly affect your score on the swag-o-meter x

anyway luigi folki u get a mediocre

6/10 

on the swag-o-meter

KEEP IT SWAG

(Especially you Luigi you naughty little swag monster :P)

Insomni-SWAGfest

asif we missed this it looked mint :( x



keep it SWAG

xxx

BIG tune - SWAG BOMB

eazy now just a quickun, check out this new deep house tune my mate just sent us!

big timers and their scary animals eyyyyy...what they like!

Sharpie & Burston Ft Scorpz - Swag on by Sharpie-DJ


A GOT MA SWAG ON and even ma champangeee! have you?

Thanks Liam Greenwood for this sick tune!!!

KEEP it SWAG...just like Greenwood the BOYO!

xxx

TOO much time on r hands?

Lots of haters have been saying that we must have too much thyme on our hands, the truth is we are just very passionate about jackin and sometimes deep house, the swagger scene, spoons, tattoos and cat. we can't help it if this is our life and it runs through our veins all we know is the sesh.

swag-o-clock

the herb thyme

people seem to like what we doing so to all you haters - it takes 5 minutes to type a post and that = enjoyment for 1000s of people in the house nation.

Thnx for all ur support those who enjoy reading what we ave to say. jackin house is all we have got thts why we r so dedicated, i sold my TV and fifa 2009 for a quater of cat !

....STILL GOT MY SWAG though :D




SEE U AT MISSION!!!!

SWAG BLOG!

xxx

SWAG - Outfit of the day 2

KET, SEX & DC10 NEED I SAY MORE!!!

What a sick tshirt - 3 of our favourite things here at SWAG blog! For those who do not know what DC10 is, its the home of jackin electro house in Ibiza. Its got red walls and fit lasses walk around in bikinis giving out free cat all night long while you dance the night away to mucky wobblers and deep bouncey chicago electro house beats. Its just round the corner from Cafe Del Mar (Where that song was made from kevin & perry) and the world famous OK Kareoke Bar. Personally i've never been to ibiza but me and the boyos plan to smash openings this year, tom's gonna put half oz of cat up his arse before we get ont plane so we can join the mile high cat club hehe naughty :P

I cant wait for all the ket, sex and kareoke, this lass has got it nailed on with this tshirt, if your wearing something with DC10 on it then you are the definition of SWAG...

10/10
on the swag-o-meter

KEEP IT SWAG

xxx

SWAG - Outfit of the day

SOMEBODY RING THE SWAG ALARM!!!!! SWAG ALERT!!!

Check this guy OUT! This picture was sent into us by one of our loyal fans who thought he looked cool. Hes got a cheeky pose - hands on hip looking away from camera we think he must be a model for ETTO or have access to some limited edition gear as that is ONE SICK VEST! Together with the new summer 2012 look of drop-crotch pants and his vivienne westwood boots this guy is obviously in the know. He would be going for SWAG blog's firsgt 10/10, unfortunately without a spoon the outfit is not complete and we can only award a....

9/10
on the swag-o-meter

KEEP IT SWAG...and remember to keep them nipples out!

xxxx

MXC - wEiRd SWAG

Have you niffed ket recently and gone wEiRd as FUCK?

dont worry, so have we its perfectly normal and its called MXC. apparantly danny sez that the pakistani or indian men got caught so there is no way of them transporting the ket plant over to the docks in hull after they have harvested them.

the ket plant (Hibiscustrionum)

even though the men got caught we have still got the drought to think about. we can jus cross our fingers nd toes and hope that the drought stops, the rains come and the indians can plant sum new ket plants so we can get ketty. their farms are so dusty and dry not even a cat plant could grow in such vile, baron and destitute fields.

drought....so awful poor indians   

if you are one of them peple who cant stand by and see people suffer from the disasters that mother nature throws at us then you can make a donation to them just email SWAGblog1@gmail.com and we will give you details of how to donate to the indian farmers.

we will just abve to get weirddddd until the rains come...but please have a heart and dont be a snob (techno) - MAKE A DONATION PLEASE

anyway this tune be going out to my troubled indian ket farmers....they defo need someone tonight




SWAG blog

xxx

SWAG tune of the day

RYAN JAMES VS KO KANE.....WHAT R U SAYINNNN!?!?

proper mucky beat this just shnozzled a cat wophead couldnt resist hehe ;) x



this one goes out to all the ladies out there...specially sara i miss u bbz <3 xx...if your reading i hope u remember thetime we went to the etap

keep it SWAG...love to all our fans i love u all so much!!! we would be nout without you and ur swagger!!!

xxxxx

INSOMNITEENZ - Teen SWAG

Shout out to insomniteenz on the 1st of June!

its going to be a messy one!!

Im proud of my little bro tom getting on the scene and following in his big bros footsteps getting to experience the amazing journey that is (real) house music.

̶r̶e̶d̶y̶ ̶b̶r̶e̶k̶  MCAT

Even going to lend him my new spoon to take on his first proper night out, he wont be eating his ready brek with it thats for sure hehe :P

Gonna take him down to each to their own this week seen a right nice t-shirt that just oozes SWAG and will go really nice with the sassy chinos from our outfit of the week's winner.


In a few years he will be joining the boyos and rest of us all ont sesh and i'll give him my old vans when that time comes but until then i think hes going to smash it in his old P.E. pumps seen as though he's only in Year 7.

Keep it SWAG meanwhile littleuns, yeah?

SWAG Blog

XXX

SWAG OFF - KAT VS KET

WHO WINS? YOU DECIDE!

KAT VS KET
	KAT
	KET
	BOTH at the same time :P
pollcode.com free polls

HAPPY SWAGGY VOTING

...SWAG

x

WE ARE REAL F**K HATERS

SWAG BLOG IS REAL

real business thing pic 

We have seen alot of shit been said about us already saying that we are shit or that we must be jokin this is no joke we are proper serious about real house music and want to bring the SWAG of house music to all of yous. the haters are just jelous cos we have become so popular so quickly its obviously that we are the best

arsense wenger - a serious man

we take it all seriously and plan our blog like arsene wenger plans his arsenal teams tactics we take everything very seriously like him so we would like it if people would stop been haters as arsene wenger is a respected man we shud be respected as much as him.

anywas here is CHOOOOOON for all you





SWAG AS FUCK takes me back to my youth this un getting ketty ont dancefloor cos the girls love bass lol ;) x


KEEP IT SWAG

x

TZ - SWAG LEGEND

SWAG ALERT!?!?!?!?!?! 

Our boy T to the Z the man who singley handedly created the house scene in leeds which spread to the rest of yorkshire with the sort of deep house nights like swagger in wakey. He grew up on the meanstreets of leeds and had to get by with MC'in but as you can see now look at him, chilling with a tiger (you know your big time when you chill with tigers)

it reminds me when i once went to knowlsey safari park with the boyos and got geebd up with some llamas it was a reyt laugh until i went under lol! we fed some geeby to the llamas and they got proper horney it always gives me a boner so we fort it would be well gud to give it to the llamas.

llamsas on geebs

 it was well funny they were shagging all day until one of em died but fuck it they are only camels or summert. who cares about animals anyway its all about bouncey wobbly mucky in ya face catty phat beats (real house music) and thats what we listened to on the way home

ANWYAY....RESPECT TO TZ thanks for all the support and help in setting SWAG blog up

KEEP IT SWAG

Xxx

SWAG tune of the day

This is the SWAG tune of the day, we all like to fuck hehe ;)!!



Nick Hannam is a legend i remember once we was getting catty in mission and i seen him playing and then he opened my eyes to house music it was so gud!

TRUE JACKIN HOUSE FOREVER!

keep it SWAG ppl!! x

SWAG = CANT WAIT FOR FORPLAY

Cant wait for FOREPLAY! Will someone from the leeds area please email us and tell us when its on and we will get onit SWAG style!!!

CHEERS!



SWAG

HECKTIK and MC BRENNO (BRYN) by DJ dan "swag" fletcher

i seen this picture and i thought it was too gud to not reblog, he has hecktik shaved into his head which obviously shwos how much he loves hecktik, i remembered me how sick it is.I went in manchester hectikkkk when my favourit MC brenno (Bryn to his boyos) was DJing

i think u should take 2mins of your time to listen to what my boyo brenno has got 4 u its really a proper good tune. this is my fav brenno song he has other gud tunes such as "mcat" and "geeby monster"



if you listen to the lyrics they r proper deeep and remind me of my ex bird sara <3 xx

"lifes like a circus, im only 21 baby girl im still lerning, too much weed got me paranoid and nervous"


i think that in the future people will look back and see bryn owen as a modern shakespere...he is just the urban version and i think we can all relate to the lyrics.

BIG UP MY BOIZ @ HECKTIK

KEEP IT SwAg!

by dj dan "swag" fletcher
xxx

SWAG - Outfit of the day

too sick

WOW!!! SWAG ALERT!!!!

We LOVE the cool guy on the rights attire, definately the champion of our special outfit of the day award! The cardigan he is wearing has a cut half zip revealing his muscular ginger tenderness and sunburn which is obviously expertly matched with the gradient of them sick chino's. Along with the pumps and the cool hat to complete the look - this guy definately has SWAG and receives a wopping...

8/10
on the swag-o-meter

KEEP IT SWAG